Some people just don't understand

Some people just don't understand that I'm not a talker. As much as I'd like to be, I just can't find it in me to keep a conversation going. It's hard. I just can't do it.

But I am a fantastic listener. I'd much rather listen to someone talk than to talk myself. I'm not the kind of person that just kind of listens but doesn't actually hear anything. If I'm listening to you, I am catching every word you say and I actually care about what you say or how you feel about something.

I think that some people don't get that. They just think I have nothing to contribute to the conversation. And yes, part of that is true. But I mostly just want to listen. I like listening to people talk about their problems and share how they feel about something. It means that they trust me with their feelings, and that's a big thing. I know because I don't like talking about my feelings and my problems because I don't really trust people with them. So when I do talk about my feelings or my problems with someone, that's a huge deal.

When someone talks about their problems or whatever, I just listen, because sometimes you just need to rant to someone and sometimes you don't actually need them to talk or comment on anything. Sometimes you just need to get stuff out of your mind and the best way to do that is to just rant, non-stop.

I hate it when my friends apologize to me after ranting. Like, honestly, don't say sorry. I want to listen. If you have something on your mind that's bugging you, by all means, rant to me; I won't judge or think of your problems as trivial.

I saw a text post on Tumblr once, I don't remember what it said, but it said something about talkers and listeners and something in that statement really struck a chord with me. I think it said something about how just because someone isn't a talker doesn't mean they don't have anything to say, it just means they're a listener, or something like that. I don't remember, it was a long time ago when I saw that post.

Yesterday, I went out to dinner with my art-careers class. My art teacher has this tradition where he takes all his art career students (art-careers is a class for grade 12s who are planning to pursue an art related career and attend an art university and the class prepares them for that) out to dinner. So anyways, as we were eating dinner, we were chatting and stuff, and while everyone at the table had a lot to say, I didn't. But that didn't mean I wasn't having fun, or I had nothing to say. I just like listening. I did have stuff to say, but I didn't say anything. It's more fun to listen than talk. For me at least.

Sometimes people perceive me as a really quiet, non-talkative person (and I am), but they don't know that I'm only quiet because I'm listening to what they have to say.