Shaming alone time

Why is it that we regard people who are alone as sad and a loner? Why can't someone just be alone because they need some time to themselves? I personally think that me-time is healthy and we all need alone time once in a while whether you're an introvert or an extrovert. I think that being alone helps refresh your mind and alone time is key to discovering who you are, you find out things about yourself that you never knew. And you get the pleasure of having yourself as company. How great is that? Me-time is healthy and we all need it, so why is it that when we see someone alone we automatically think oh, they're so lonely, I feel so bad for them, they have no one. You know what I mean? Like we just feel this light punch in the heart because that person is all alone.

Being alone is great, but the idea of being alone terrifies people and there's something about it that makes people try to avoid it at all costs. I think the very idea of being alone is horrifying because people shame you for being alone. They look at you like you're a hurt puppy or something and they feel like they have to forcefully be nice to you because you're "a loner". You're alone and therefore you are sad: that's the main assumption. But more often than not, when we see people alone, they are more happy than we could ever imagine them to be. So why do we look down upon being alone?

I love going to the mall by myself sometimes and just walk around. I love going to the bookstore by myself and just discover new books and authors that I've never heard of. And it may be my imagination but sometimes it feels like people, especially groups of girls with their friends (around my age), look at me and think aw... That girl has no friends... LONER! You know that look they get on their faces like they're above you somehow and they look you up and down like they evaluating your loserness? I feel like people, groups of girls in particular, do that all the time to those who are alone.

The people who are constantly surrounded by others, who are either actually their friends or just acquaintances, see people like me who enjoy alone time every so often and label them as "losers" or "loners" and shame them with their menacing looks.

In high school, EVERYONE gives a shit about you being alone. They make you feel so horrible about yourself, and in some cases, they may force you to make faux friends just to look like you aren't a loner. Honestly I am a-okay with being alone. But in high school, your peers can make you feel so shitty when you're alone with their aw-you-poor-thing looks and their innocent questions like why are you sitting ALL BY YOURSELF. I feel like that very question throws enough shame in my face to make me want to shrink away. Whether it is intentional or not, their question is hurtful and outright makes you feel like utter crap; the "all by yourself" part is THE. WORST. THING. EVER! They make it sound like you somehow brought this loneliness and friendlessness to yourself.

I love being alone, but I hate to be seen alone. I don't want to be labelled as a loner or get sympathetic looks from people. Nowadays, I get uncomfortable being alone in public because literally all I can think about is what other people will think of me and how they will be secretly shaming me for being alone.

Being alone is great and fantastic, but in our society, we have somehow created the unspoken law of shaming people for being alone.

I encourage you to overlook people's opinions of you, and to spend some time alone. And if you already do that like me, try to block out those taunting thoughts and just enjoy the company of you. Alone time is what you make of it, so change your perspective on it; don't see it as a bad thing.

Don't shame people for being alone because believe me, it makes them feel like shit.

So go out and spend some quality alone time!